Why Keen?

November 3, 2006

ICT Day Seven – Ten : Out Pro lor!

Finally out processed today. The hardest day to get through by far. Back hurts like hell today. Spent the entire morning playing ‘bluff’. Tricked Michael Thiam like crazy.

Questions :-
1) Why did the entire battalion have to play cohesion games at the very last hour of the very last day of ICT, when the rest of the day was spent doing nothing?

For cohesion. Depends on what cohesion means. The entire bunch of reservists felt cohesive enough. As I was f**king out loud about the inefficiency of the out process. Someone from another company, another platoon whom I have never seen before told me to “relax… last day liao. Just tong finish this stupid thing, and get out.”

2) Why were meals indented for the entire battalion for the entire ICT when we could have left early for most of the days?

Must be because SFI kao bei that they waste resources and earn too little, since most reservist personnels do not want their food. “Right hand pocket, put to the left hand pocket”

3) Why survey is done before out processing?

Because out processing is the most time consuming, and has the most inefficiency.

4) Video cameras and phones are really banned in camps because of security meh? In out ICT camp, need security one meh?

No.

SAF Spent a lot of money on these series of commercials to make soldiers look damn garang…

some bloody idiots make stupid video clips… makes soldiers look damn gu niang…

Aiyah… whatever it is… its over. Now its time to focus back on work. and focusing on getting my back healed by Monday.

October 31, 2006

ICT Day Six : Report Sick

Nothing much to say. Except that in one day, I managed to read half of the book I had started one week ago. “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” by John Gray.

I stayed overnight in bunk on Sunday. Reported sick on Monday. I must say that the waiting time at the Medical Centre had shortened tremendously.

I used to complain to anyone who would listen about my bad experience with the medical centre last year. The system at the medical centre in camp was extremely inefficient. I had reported sick last ICT in the morning at 8.30a.m, and only received my status printout and medication at 3p.m. in the afternoon. By 10a.m. I had seen the MO, and was waiting for the results. Having waited an hour, I asked the medic on duty periodically for the results, starting from 11a.m.

By the fourth time I asked, at around 12.30p.m. The medic told me that everyone went for lunch. (Including the medic who was around at 12p.m. whom I was checking with constantly) Somehow, he, and the others who was there, neglected to tell me. I was waiting like a idiot for so long, and they happily went for lunch without telling the supposedly sick patient. (I had a fever, by the way.)

Anyway, this time round, the whole process at the medical centre took less than one hour. I got my “Attend C” status (can go home) and some medication by 9.30 a.m.

But why could I finish half a book, you ask?

This time it is the procedure of my unit that is the problem. Since my company is off for exercise, I come under the jurisdiction of the ME Platoon for that day. However, the ME Platoon was leaving in the afternoon, they were handing over the ‘sick party’ (the lost and wounded) to a Warrant Officer in charge of the ICT unit.

Thus “the sick” were told to wait for instructions as we were to have a briefing with him. Estimated time of arrival? 11.30 a.m.

I was told, “Why don’t you sit around the office, and relax? We will be leaving at noon, then the warrant officer would brief all of you.”

The time was 9.45a.m. when he said that. 2 hours away from time of arrival of the esteemed warrant O’. Of course I didn’t wait. I went to bunk to finish half of my book, had a short nap, and still made it in time to meet my guardian for the next 3 days.

At the office, the warrant officer basically said that, since the rest of the unit is out for exercise, we cannot possibly join them. However, we cannot possibly “zhuo bor lan” (his exact words) either.

I am not sure if he got confused over our medical status, or whether he was genuinely being nice to us sick folks. In the end, he allowed the “Attend C” to go home and report to him after their “Attend C” status is over, but asked those on other excuse to report to him thrice per day, although meals were not provided.

Whatever, I was just happy to leave. My back was killing me, I was coughing pretty badly, and the MO gave me lozenges and gargling solution for it. Up till today, the medical centre still maintain the policy of ‘no antibiotics’.

I am staring to sound like a old lady. (Literally…)

October 29, 2006

Hope in Fear?

Now I am sitting in front of my computer, I feel tired, but cannot sleep. That’s because when I lie down, I feel nerve firings through my legs, my neck, my hands randomly.

The worst attack I have ever had was when I twisted in my sleep. An intense shot of pain shot through my nerves in my body, and no matter what position I lie in, I feel the pain. Hwei Min was there and I was literally screaming, and sobbing, not knowing what to do.

Whenever I lie down and I feel an ache in my back sometimes, I feel an overwhelming sense of fear rush over me. I start to imagine the worst, I start visualizing what is causing the pain in my spine. I start to imagine what will happen if i lose my ability to move my limbs. I think of the consequences to my family.

Knowing what I learnt from “The Secret”, I know I should not focus on it too much, and instead, look forward to a full recovery. But lying down, feeling and jolting at every single tingle of my nerves, it’s hard, you know?

So I am sitting in front of the pc… googling for information about my injury. I came to looking for news about Michael J. Fox, and somehow found some inspiration from watching an interview of him on Youtube.

October 29, 2006

ICT Day Five : Back Problem

Supposed to go back tonight, and be staying overnight in camp before going out field for exercise tomorrow.

My back problem is worsening. Last few days, I just felt a slight backache. Today, I start feeling muscular and nervous spasms all over my body when I lie down. Not good.

I think I will have to report sick. Don’t think I want to go out field. Don’t feel good dropping out like a loser, but I don’t want to injure myself for life over a few days of maintaining my ego.

October 29, 2006

ICT Day Three/Four : Training – Appreciation

Past two days were spent doing basic engineering tasks. Not too bad, mainly refreshers, we forgot most of the procedures but our past knowledge kicked in shortly after ‘hands on’.

As usual, though, lots of time spent waiting. The standard SAF motto, “Rush to wait, wait to rush” applies all the time. It seems no matter how much planning you put into arranging your tasks, so as to speed things up, SAF just seems to break everything back down and slow you down. It’s very interesting, you know?

Once you put on the uniform, you suddenly become a little more stupid, and time seems to flow slower.

However, someone put things into a very positive perspective yesterday.

We were in a training shed, and it just happened to be breezy. That guy (i can’t remember who) said that he treated ICTs like a retreat, a time to reflect. It’s true… The training shed we were in was in the middle of a field, and when I heard that observation, the trees, the grass, the breeze quite suddenly become quite surreal.

After being introduced to it by Kok Boon, I watched a movie called “The Secret” not too long ago. (www.thesecret.tv) It describes the secret to success. I shall not reveal too much, you can take a look at the video at youtube, but having watched the movie, I found that ICT served another purpose.

The Secret

ICT takes away things I take for granted. Things like freedom of time, ability to keep clean, having a nicely cooked meal and all the other comforts of modern life, but much more importantly, time with family.

It is a part of human nature that we take things for granted after having it for a while. From what I recall from studying psychology, that’s how our brain functions. Our thoughts and sensations being ‘electrical signals’ in the brain… after many times of repetitive ‘signals’ of the same kind, our brain builds a huge trunking line between the parts of the brain that are involved in that signal. This is so to make our brain process this information faster, and allow more of the adaptive parts of our brain to take in new information.

In short, we are wired to just accept certain sensations as the norm, after repeating it too many times.

The problem with that is that we tend to forget what we already have, and we tend to focus on things that we do not want. We then complain about things that are now not going on too well in our lives.

The more we focus on the things we DO NOT want, the unhappier we become, and the more the things we do not want become a reality.

To me, we need to constantly remind ourselves of the things we already have, the things that are going on well, and have been going on well. We are thus, training our minds to become in-tuned with the things that we DO want.

Sounds cheem? I think not. Think about it and I think you can find dozen examples of people who are unhappier and unhappier, and are thus becoming unhappier and unhappier still. Nothing mystical about that!